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W-File: ulexplosion.html

Type: Urban Legend
Location: Milwaukee, Wisconsin


Martin was obsessed with Monica Lewinski. He carried her picture in his billfold and plastered his office cubicle with her likeness. His desire for the presidential aide, who became an instant celebrity when President Clinton admitted to having an affair with her, drove him to heavy drinking on New Year's Eve.
 



Walking through the streets of Milwaukee, visiting each bar he could find, Martin eventually decided on which bar he would choose to ring in the new year. Entering the tavern, Martin found he was just about as inebriated as the other patrons. After a few more drinks, he became delusional. A junoesque brunette entered the bar just as the bartender was counting down to the new year. Then, at the stroke of midnight, it happened!

Martin, who was watching the brunette enter, started shouting at her "Monica, Monica, over here, baby!" As the crowd counted down, Martin made his way toward the unsuspecting ersatz Miss Lewinski. Martin was so sexually excited and aroused that the unspeakable happened.

Martin's left testicle exploded! Somehow the exploding testicle set off a chain reaction that paramedics couldn't explain. The exploding testicle burst with such force that Martin was killed instantly!

The brunette fled immediately and could not be found for questioning.